It’s those voices.
I’m sick of them.
You likely know the voices, the ones that come to you in your weakest times. The voices that tell you everything that’s wrong with you, your life, your world, they keep you up at night. They tell you nothing good, in fact, they’re so darn convincing that you start to believe them…or am I the only one?
I started off this week with a lack of sleep caused by these voices. They attack me constantly as I lay down to sleep, reminding me of so many things wrong…
- You’re not good enough
- Thailand doesn’t need you
- Finances is always going to plague you
- Your friends don’t really like you
- Loneliness is you
- You’re never going to look good
- Nobody is ever going to love you
- You cannot do anything successfully
- Life is never going to go your way
- You will never have energy
- You are not healthy
- Your life is a dead end street
I actually hope I’m off in left field on this and that I’m the only one this ever happens to. I loose sleep with these things and I’m friggin’ over it.
I hear daily of someone else with health problems, someone else dieing, someone else coming from a broken home, someone else heart-broken, someone else loosing their mind….the list can go on and on and on, but you get the point, we live in a jacked up broken world, and I feel the weight of it a lot, and can’t stop thinking of it in the times I am the weakest.
The voice seems to be never ending, as Kris Vallotton refers to it as lunch dates with the devil. He has a great series on Spiritual Warfare, at one point talking about how we tend to listen to the negative voice more than God’s words that have been spoken over us. He talks of how we allow the devil to use his only remaining weapon of words, lies and deception against us, and how we need that to stop.
Why is it that we can hear the above phrases so much louder in our head than the truths God’s spoken over us? I’m convinced I’m not the only one that does this, but I’m also declaring today that I’m not going to allow it. Instead we need to speak into our own lives and others truths. The convincing words of the devil need to be the very thing used against him…
- You ARE good enough, in fact, there’s nobody better for this than you
- Thailand does need me
- I’m not a pauper, but my God has finances of a King, and I’m his child
- My friends don’t know what to do without me (ok, so that’s a little overboard…hah!)
- Life of fullness is screaming inside of me
- Damn, I look good (also a little overboard, but you get the point… haha!)
- People love me, and I am not going to be lonely.
- Success follows me wherever I go
- Life isn’t supposed to go ‘my way’ but instead where He goes I’ll go…
- I cannot wait to take on this day full of energy and life from the ultimate provider
- I walk in ever increasing health
- My life is a multi-directional highway without end!
The list needs to go on, but for your sake of already being bored to tears if you’ve made it this long, I’ll stop!
I simply know that I’ve allowed the attacks to seep into my life for too long, and it’s time to regain territory in this! I’m no longer taking the voice of the enemy to heart, but I’m going to listen to the voice of God instead…as one of my favorite bands, needtobreathe, puts it:
Oh, this is the way I wanna go down
(This is the last time) I’m starting over with you
This is the way I wanna go outI never second-guesssed the little voice I heard
It’s just a whisper, that sounded like a scream
I aint never felt so free
That whisper that sounded like a scream? that’s the one I want to follow…and I’ve never felt so free!
